Peter Fletcher

  • About
  • Blog
  • Contact

7 ways to deal with negative people

February 1, 2014 by Peter Fletcher

Sad dog

There are ways to deal with negative people in our lives. Image: Pets Adviser

Let’s face it, negative people can be a drag. Their whining, nit-picking and gloomy outlook can make us want to give up on our goals and ambitions.

But we don’t have to put up with negative people.

Although it may seem that there’s nothing we can do about them, there is.

Rather than passively soaking up their angst, here are 7 ways to deal with negative people courtesy of Stepcase Lifehacker.

1. Spend less time with them.
Yes, that means physically separating yourself from your down-in-the-mouth friends. That may mean making a conscious decision to spend less time with Uncle Festus but you’ll be healthier and happier in the long run.

2. Speak up for yourself
In my first few weeks in real estate someone very close to me asked me why I thought I could sell real estate.

“You’ve never sold a thing in your life,” was their negative assessment.

“I will because I said I will,” was my response.

I sold 54 properties the next year.

The lesson, don’t absorb other people’s crap. No matter who it’s coming from it’s still crap and it’s worth letting them know you stand for playing a bigger game.

3. Don’t pretend that their behaviour is “OK.”
I once had guests over for dinner. We got into a discussion about the ethics of real estate sales people. Of course their views were anything but positive.

A couple of days later I noticed that I was feeling gloomy and dark and started to wonder why.

I traced back my gloom to that conversation.

Having worked out where my gloom had originated I was straight on the phone.

“You’ll always be welcome in my home, I said, “but don’t ever speak about agents that way again.”

“Agents make moral and ethical decisions that most people will never have to make,” I explained. “And until you’ve walked in their shoes you’re not welcome to dump your negative, cynical views about agents on me, especially while you’re in my home.”

They got the message.

4. Don’t make their problems your problems.
Helping a mate out in need is the Aussie thing to do. It’s good to listen to someone’s problem and help out where we can.

But it’s another thing altogether to make your friend’s problem your problem, especially when they have no commitment to doing something about it themselves.

And let’s face it, some people are masters at garnering sympathy for themselves through creating a never-ending series of dramas and problems. More fool us if we fall for the trap.

5. Change the subject.
Sure, acknowledge what the person has to say but then move the conversation to something more positive.

So, how about those Fremantle Dockers, hey?

That usually does the trick.

6. Talk about solutions, not problems.
Sometimes changing the topic of conversation isn’t possible. If that’s the case it’s worthwhile switching things up so that the conversation becomes an active effort to search for a solution.

“If there was a solution, what do you think it might be?” you might ask.

A question like that is often all that’s needed to get the conversation to shift to creating possible solutions. That’s way more fun than wallowing in the mire of problems and drama.

7. Leave them behind.
Yep, sometimes you just have to say adios and move on. It can be tough, especially if your friend is close or is a family member.

In the long run you’ll be healthier and happier and the world will be a better place.

Take a moment to share:

  • Tweet
  • Email

Related posts:

  1. People don’t trust company blogs. What you should do about it. People don’t trust company blogs. What you should do about...
  2. Social networking a no-brainer for real estate There appears to be little conflict between real estate and...
  3. Google-DoubleClick deal seen winning approval | CNET News.com Google-DoubleClick deal seen winning approval | CNET News.com: “Antitrust experts...
  4. 10 tips that will help turn your New Year’s Eve wishes into reality Today is the 1st of January. It’s a day that...
  5. 7 ways Facebook can help Pages A recent arrival in my inbox was a missive from...

Filed Under: Life strategies Tagged With: life strategies, negativity, positive outlook, positivity

About Peter

Speaker, trainer and coach. I write about living, loving and working better. Love a challenge. More...

Subscribe

Get the latest posts delivered to your inbox.

Recent Posts

  • Mandating madness: The case against compulsory e-conveyancing
  • PEXA: Stop treating conveyancers like idiots
  • Page 1 of 365
  • Looking back, looking forward
  • 10 simple ways to help make the world a better place

Top Posts & Pages

  • Foucault on Confession
  • Why saying "You've got potential" can be the worst thing to say
  • Foucault on power relations
  • Let’s hate on REA for a moment. It’s easy and it's fun!
  • Surveillance and the capitalist state | Giddens
  • Why I'm interested in self-writing and the hupomnemata
  • So just why did you add me as a Friend?
  • An example of parrhesia
  • 7 ways to handle rejection like a pro
  • Contact

Location

You can find me at Residential Settlements in Burswood.

5/170 Burswood Road
Burswood WA 6100

Let’s catch up

If you're ready to take your business to the next level, get in touch with me now.

Send me an email using the contact form or call me direct on 0419 538 838.

Connect

Connect with me on one of these social networks.
  • Facebook
  • Google+
  • Linkedin
  • Tumblr
  • Twitter

Copyright © 2019 · Agency Pro Theme on Genesis Framework · WordPress · Log in

loading Cancel
Post was not sent - check your email addresses!
Email check failed, please try again
Sorry, your blog cannot share posts by email.